Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Week 4: Lucky Balls

Today let's explore Anthroponomastics, the study of the names of humans, and how it relates to our beloved Team Each Hit.

Lucky Balls:
Let's begin by exploring our opponent's name. Lucky Balls, named with the hope that a team with horribly low averages would every now and then throw a few lucky balls and surprisingly pull off a victory. Unfortunately for them, luck can only get you so far in a game of such precision and skill as bowling.

Double Bagger:
Despite many common misconceptions, the name Double Bagger was inspired by the bowling terminology which is used when a bowler nets two consecutive strikes in two consecutive frames. This name could not be more appropriate for this amazing bowler. Clearly the power house on Team Each Hit, Double Bagger is continually improving her game (thanks in great part to GumBall) and knocks down strike after strike to maintain her dominance. The name Double Bagger also is a reference to the fact that you can count on two of her three games to be in the bag. True to form, this week Double Bagger helped to ensure that games two and three were in the bag by posting amazing performances in each.

Lefty:
Lefty, why do we call him Lefty you might ask? I don't know, maybe it's because he's Irish. Others might speculate the origin stems from his hook and the ability to always hit the left side of the head pin. Or possibly it's comes from the pin EXPLOSION that occurs when he bowls. An explosion which seldom leaves any pins left(y). Whatever the source of the nickname, Lefty is becoming a dominant bowler this year. This week he posted a weekly average 10 pins above normal. This vast improvement was greatly appreciated as some Team Each Hitters were unable to post any respectable numbers (see Pink Shoes).

The Cooler:
For people who have had the privilege of meeting The Cooler in person, one might easily conclude that this name stems from his freakish high body temperature which results in him wearing flip flops all year round and often sporting shorts in the dead of winter. Thus, he is ever striving to be cooler. But, this name really is derived from this bowlers amazing ability to stay cool under pressure. On more than one occasion, Team Each Hit's only hope for victory rested on his shoulders. And this week was like no other, stringing together an amazing strike-strike-nine combination to finish game two, The Cooler was in perfect form and sealed the victory for the team.

Pink Shoes:
Pink Shoes got her name from the flashy bowling footwear she dons at the bowling alley each week. This week the old pink shoes were retired for a new and improved pair. Unfortunately, Pink Shoes was unable to find her rhythm with the new footwear and this week the name of Stink Shoes was probably more appropriate.

Next Week: Team Each Hit vs. Shake 'n Bake, 9pm @ Sawmill Lanes. Hope to see you all there!

Go Each Hit!!
Captain Pink Shoes

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Week 3: Spartan Spirit

This week we had the great pleasure of bowling against the rejected Spartan Cheerleaders (you all remember them from SNL fame). Arianna, Craig and two new wannabe cheerleaders were full of pep, and of course cheers, throughout the entire evening. So for your reading enjoyment, I decided I'd pass along the cheers they created and performed for us at the end of each game this week.

Game One:
We're bowlin strikes, we're bowlin spares...
But for us, breaking 100 is really rare!!
Catch the momentum that we create...
'Cause Game One's the game we dominate!
Say it loud, say it proud GO SPARTAN SPIRIT!
Again, GO SPARTAN SPIRIT!!!
DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE!! YEAH!! (Imagine lots of leg kicks and bag flips to finish this cheer off... )

Game Two:
L - U..... C - K - Y Team Each Hit ain't got no alibi
They stole this game
But they'll steal no more
Watch out now, Spartan Spirit's gonna Score!!!
GIVE A HOOT DON'T POLLUTE!

Game Three:
Bowl, bowl, bowl the ball
Make, make, make pins fall
Bowl the ball to make them fall!!
Strike, strike, strike and spare!!
Team Each Hit won but we don't care!
Spartan, Spartan, Spartan Spirit!!
We lost three points but we'll still cheer it!!
SAFE SEX!!

Next Week: Team Each Hit vs. Team 5, 9pm @ Sawmill Lanes. Hope to see you all there!

Go Each Hit!
Captain Pink Shoes

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Week 2: All Star Wars

It is a period of civil war. Team Each Hit bowlers, striking
whenever possible, have won their first victory against the evil
Nada Sight Empire. During the battle, Team Each Hit spies
managed to steal the secret tactical game plans for the
Pizza Pitcher Beer League's ultimate weapon, All-Star
Wars, an unbeatable bowling power house set to take
control of the entire bowling community. Pursued
by the Pizza Pitcher Beer League's sinister
agents, Leia (Double Bagger) races back
to the alley, custodian of the stolen
plans that can save her team
and restore Team Each Hit's
domination of the lanes...


A New Hope:
Leia (aka Double Bagger) has been the strongest force in defending Team Each Hit from the advances of Dark Forces in the Pizza Pitcher Beer League. She is captured and Luke Skywalker (aka The Cooler) and his two newly found compatriots, Han Solo (aka Lefty) and Chewbacca (aka Pink Shoes), search to rescue her. Together, the threesome are able to save Leia (Double Bagger) and escape the grip of the Imperial All-Star Wars Fighters. With this victory, the Rebel Forces of Team Each Hit hoped to destroy the dark force, so following the voice of Obi-Wan, Luke (The Cooler) uses the Bowling Force and destroys the All-Star Wars, winning Game One.

The Empire Strikes Back: Darth Vader and the All-Star Wars have located The Rebel Forces of Team Each Hit hiding on the remote ice planet Hoth. Team Each Hit is forced to flee. Luke (The Cooler) in his X-wing fighter fights a tough battle while Han (Lefty), Chewy (Pink Shoes) and Leia (Double Bagger) flee to the Millennium Falcon and hide. Luke (The Cooler) is shot down and crash lands on Dagobah where he encounters Yoda and he is put through rigorous lessons about the metaphysical nature of bowling. Sensing that the rest of the team is in danger Luke (The Cooler) returns to Cloud City and meets Vader for a bowl off. Vader prevails in this duel, leaving Luke (The Cooler) without a strike, spare or mark. Rubbing in his domination on the alley, Vader utters... "Who's your Daddy Luke... I'm your daddy... I own you! The Rebel Forces of Team Each Hit were dominated by the Imperial All-Star Wars Fighters, score one for the Dark Side in Game Two.

Return of the Jedi: In the final battle, Chewy (Pink Shoes), Leia (Double Bagger) and Luke (The Cooler) confront Jabba the Hut and defeat him in order to save Han. In the battle Boba Fett is also killed. A new death star is created and Luke (The Cooler) is tempted by Vader to the dark side. In the end, Vader turns on the evil Emperor and destroys him but he is also killed in the battle. With all members of All-Star Wars out of the way, Luke (The Cooler), Leia (Double Bagger), Han (Lefty) and Chewy (Pink Shoes) return to Endor to celebrate the GRAND defeat with the Ewoks. And in a strange twist, Luke (The Cooler) reveals to Leia (Double Bagger) that they are siblings**

Next Week: Team Each Hit vs. Spartans, 9pm @ Sawmill Lanes. Hope to see you all there!

Go Each Hit!
Captain Pink Shoes
*** Oddly enough the alley accidentally listed Double Bagger as Karla Bednar.... I SWEAR I DIDN'T DO IT.... But it would've been a whole lot cooler if I did :-D... hysterical!!!

Tuesday, January 9, 2007

Week 1: Nada Sight

Welcome back bowling enthusiasts!!

Yesterday evening, on National Static Electricity Day, Team Each Hit walked back into the Sawmill Lanes AMF Bowling Alley with a new swagger. They had their heads held high, they walked with conviction, there was no way a silly gator was gonna mess with their bowling mentality.

Their newly found confidence must have been intimidating, because immediately after signing in, Team Each Hit's opponent for the week turned tail and hid. They knew they didn't have a chance against this dominating force, so they weren't even gonna try. With Nada Sight outta sight, Team Each Hit was able to relax and really enjoy their first week out.

It became immediately apparent that, unlike some other team that will remain nameless, the 51 days (plus 208) that they had off didn't seem to hinder Team Each Hit's performance. They appeared well prepared and they knew better than to go for a 4th and short in only the 2nd quarter. Their offense couldn't be overpowered by the strong Nada Sight defense. And, even when slightly behind, Team Each Hit knew not to ever let their opponent think they were desperate. Instead, Team Each Hit bowled like the champions they were last season and easily took all 4 points this week.

The ladies of Team Each Hit looked to hit their stride immediately, while the boys and their hooks took some time to iron out the kinks. But truly, the biggest star of the week was the new addition to the team. A new, neon pink, 12 pound, gumball scented, addition to the Team Each Hit family. All of us on Team Each Hit would like to warmly welcome Double Bagger's new ball, GumBall, to the team. We have already seem a massive improvement in Double Bagger's pin action with GumBall in her arsenal. And yes, I was serious about the ball being scented.

Don't believe me?!! Come give the ball a sniff for yourself, Team Each Hit takes on their next victim Next Tuesday, January 16 at 9PM at Sawmill Lanes. Hope to see you all there!

GO EACH HIT!!
Captain Pink Shoes